WHY I DO WHAT I DO?!

If ones motives are wrong, nothing can be right .

-G.W. Carver.

Vocabulary.com defines motive as “the psychological feature that arouses an organism to action toward a desired goal; the reason for the action; that which gives purpose and direction to behavior”

But….      In a layman’s term…., (that is in my head๐Ÿ˜€๐Ÿ˜€)  motive can simply be said to be the REASON behind the ACTION.

Hey FAM, am sure by now you either know where I’m heading to OR you are like ‘what in the world’s name is this girl talking about?’๐Ÿ˜€๐Ÿ˜€๐Ÿ˜€ well if you fall in the latter group..hehehehe!, Ma binu( it means i’m sorry or don’t be vexed).           Okay okayyy but just before I unconfuse the confused, let me start with a tiny story

Sometime back in my universities days, the desire to sing appeared from only God knows where… A few friends had deceived me that I had a lovely voice….hahahaha and  ohhh boy was I dumb to believe them. Now hold on!!!! My voice wasn’t that bad sooo stop laughing, ๐Ÿ˜’๐Ÿ˜’๐Ÿ˜’but it definitely wasn’t lovely.

Now being newly converted believer I was experiencing Gods mercy so much and of course I wanted to testify to Gods goodness during a particular Sunday service. Can you guess how I wanted to testify??

Hehehe you got it right…. I wanted to sing to the glory of God๐Ÿ˜€๐Ÿ˜€… But I had made a dangerous prayer a few days back concerning my singing… Wanna know what I said… ” dear Lord, if I ever sing my testimony.., not to your glory but so people would hear how sweet I thought my voice was, please let me sing off-key”.

So back to the story, and as you know I decided to sing my testimony…………….. Ahhhhh! It was horrible, if you are music inclined you’ll understand what I mean when I say I was swapping parts, from soprano to tenor to auto to treble…., in one very short song. I was so embarrassed, after the service, my girlfriend came up to me laughing and was like “Joy weytin  happen… That your special number wan destroy my ear drum” I honestly wished the ground would swallow me.

On getting to my hostel, still embarrassed from the events of d day, laying on my bed I wondered why I had sang so terribly and that was when I remembered my prayer…, then and only then did I truly check the reason why I wanted to sing my testimony.

I was doing the right thing for the wrong reason, and at the end of the day…., it brought only shame.

Now you see guys, some or most of us are victims of these things: wrong motives but right actions. 

Have you ever stopped to ask yourself     ” why am I doing what I am doing?”……..Those clothes you gave out, or the gifts you bought for that special person, or the reason why you signed up to be a chorister/ a worker in God’s vineyard, or the money you gave your friend the other day!, WHY DID YOU DO IT?

Did you give, so that when you want to ask for a favour later on, the person wouldn’t be able to say no!, are you a chorister just because you believe you have a great voice and you just want people to know, are you giving out that gift to the orphanage so people will see you and praise you, are you praying ever so loudly, so people will hear and know you are a prayer warrior and God’s own child?.

I’m 100% certain that this is the reason the bible says and I quote: 2We justify our actions by appearances; God examines our motive.” 8.Mixed motives twist life into tangles;pure motives take you straight down the road.

                                               -Proverbs 21:2&8( Msg ).

As a child of God who strives to make heaven at the end of the day…. Never justify your actions by how good they were, but the MOTIVE behind the action.

Thank you for reading and from now on, do an appraisal of your action…ask yourself, why am I really doing this?.

God bless… Xoxo๐Ÿ˜˜๐Ÿ˜˜๐Ÿ˜˜๐Ÿ˜˜๐Ÿ˜˜๐Ÿ˜˜๐Ÿ˜˜๐Ÿ˜˜๐Ÿ˜˜

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21st CENTURY RELATIONSHIP= NO SEX? ( PART2)๐Ÿ˜’๐Ÿ˜’๐Ÿ˜’

This issue is not even a joke anymore, and I am deeply troubled? I did a writeup about this some months ago but I just have to come back to it….๐Ÿ˜ฑ๐Ÿ˜ฑ๐Ÿ˜ฑ๐Ÿ˜ฑ

21st century relationships are synonymous to sex… Its a package deal now, you’ll hear stuffs like ” I can’t date my girl without sexing her” or ” baby… sex before marriage ain’t Bad, 


we humans and God understands”๐Ÿ˜•๐Ÿ˜•๐Ÿ˜• … I hear Una ohhh, and hold up I’m not just attacking the guys, the girls too got no chilllzzz and its sad.
I remember reading a book way back that said and I quote ” sex destroys a relationship”…. Hahaha i know it doesnt sound right to you , but I totally agreed with it then and I still do now… Nowadays couples don’t know how to just be around each other and just simply talk, plan, play, truly communicate and grow together… And its damn SAD.

Was speaking with my mum the night before and she said, if you have sex with this guy now.. , what’s gonna happen when you marry? That is IF you marry!!..  What is the rush?.. What is gonna be so special about your  “WEDDING NIGHT?” She went further to explain  that the whole idea of sex before marriage is like ” STEALING FROM YOURSELF“…….. Now a person without dept will say “well its mine after all right?” But you missing the point, which is “STEALING” . STEALING IS WRONGGGG… like it or not๐Ÿ˜ฐ๐Ÿ˜ฐ

Now this gist will not bother you if you ain’t right with God, or if your major goal in life is not to please God….

I AM NOT A SAINT BY ALL MEANS๐Ÿ˜•๐Ÿ˜•๐Ÿ˜ฅ๐Ÿ˜ฅ but each day we live, God gives us an opportunity to do it right,stand up from the ground, set godly examples and live by them and succeed so that others will follow.

And so I salute all the men loving up without sex, honoring their marriage beds and the partner…and to the young girls keeping themselves, its not stupidity I promise…

Like I always say being bad is too easy nowadays, back then being bad was so hard… But now being bad holds no appeal.

Honor God, honor yourself and your partner and the foundation of  your relationship and marriage.

God ain’t having sex you know, if He made that commandment its because its good for you, and not for Him.

A word is enough for the wise.๐Ÿ˜€๐Ÿ˜€

Feel free to argue or support or hate .. I’l still love you so much… Thank you for reading๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜˜๐Ÿ˜˜๐Ÿ˜˜ hugs n kisses.

Happy Holidays

Truly…that’s my wish!…and that’s why I cooked up this short read!๐Ÿ˜˜๐Ÿ˜˜

This ๐ŸŽ… Christmas  seems to me like it should be tagged “simple Christmas“….. Pastor Biodun Fatoyinbo of COZA is definitely in the spirit…๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿ‘ as this was the theme of their Carol night.

See fam, let’s be serious๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜……Everything is definitely pointing to a  simple Christmas celebration…. Here are some facts and advice you should consider this holidays.

1. Less spending:                                    yessss less spending…come to think of it, maybe, just maybe! God is tired of the extravagant spending all in the name of christmas…so He is allowing the poor financial state of the economy.. Plus mmm shutting down before you could withdraw…( hahahahahha sorry guys)…see less has always been more… Sooo buy less, cook less, eat less….๐Ÿ˜€๐Ÿ˜€๐Ÿ˜€

2. Give more:                                            Some will say now ” Joy which kind rubbish talk๐Ÿ˜ก๐Ÿ˜ฉ” …….if we spend less, how do we give More?

“Give, it shall be given unto you, good measures…pressed down and shaken together shall men give unto your bossom”…..

                                                         –Bible.

Whether you are a believer or not…this is a time tested principle of life…. You’ve heard of quotes like “givers never lack”, “its better to give than to receive”…     Do your research….majority of your wealthy personalities enagage in this life principle…. And besides this is the season where God gave His very best just for me and you…

So why get stingy! Huh?

Sow seeds this December and breeze through 2017! Seriously FAM! Try itttt…. .if you are currently doing this and it works for you…pls comment down below๐Ÿ™๐Ÿ˜‰



Do you know some families spend soo much for just 24th and 25th….not thinking of January and the responsibilities that come with it!?๐Ÿ˜พ๐Ÿ™€…..๐Ÿ˜ฎ๐Ÿ˜ฎ the rent, the school fees,the feeding,the electricity bills,and so on!

In short….am done talking๐Ÿ™๐Ÿ™….so in summary… Spend less .  . . . give more… ( give your time, give your prayers, give a hug, give a โ˜บ, give a book, give a plate of hot meal….. Giveeeee!๐Ÿ™๐Ÿ™)..

You won’t regret it

Merry Simple Christmas!!!!๐Ÿ’–๐Ÿ’–๐Ÿ’–๐Ÿ’–๐Ÿ’–๐ŸŽ„๐ŸŽ„๐ŸŽ„๐ŸŽ„๐ŸŽ„๐ŸŽ„๐ŸŽ„๐ŸŽ„๐ŸŽ‰๐ŸŽ‰๐ŸŽ‰๐ŸŽ‰๐ŸŽ‰๐ŸŽ‰๐ŸŽ‰๐ŸŽŠ๐ŸŽŠ๐ŸŽŠ๐ŸŽŠ๐ŸŽ‡๐ŸŽ‡๐ŸŽ‡๐ŸŽ‡๐ŸŽ‡๐ŸŽ‡๐ŸŽ‡๐ŸŽ‡


Love to the world!

Thank you for reading and please don’t forget to like and subscribe๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜˜๐Ÿ˜˜๐Ÿ˜˜๐Ÿ˜˜๐Ÿ˜˜

WHAT IS THE ONE LESSON YOUR EX TAUGHT YOU? ๐Ÿ˜Ÿ๐Ÿ˜•

Funny topic right?

Whats up guysssss….. Wha a gwan!? ย How’s your week coming? ย ?mine has been! ๐Ÿ˜ ๐Ÿ˜ก๐Ÿ˜–๐Ÿ˜ฒ๐Ÿ˜Ÿ๐Ÿ˜ฌ๐Ÿ˜•..if you get what i mean! ๐Ÿ˜‰

Yea, ย so just like the topic says, ย the one lesson your ย ex taught you… Good or bad, ย i wana know! ย Yea yea I’ll ย tell ย you mine too ……๐Ÿ˜’๐Ÿ˜’

Yoooo! ย Its not even funny but my last relationship taught me to observe a guys stingy nature….. There truly is a difference between stingy and being a stingy koko! Ahhhhhhhhhh!๐Ÿ˜จ๐Ÿ˜ฑ. ย  ย  ย  ย  ย ok leme give you this gist:

So during my nysc days …in the camp, ย i was sooo broke, ย i cant even explain guys , the brokeness ehnnn, i had just 5nairaaaaa๐Ÿ˜ซ๐Ÿ˜ซ. ย I call up my supposed boyfriend and we gisted and gisted and credit finishes…. He calls back and when he is about to drop, ย  am like “baby please ย send me recharge card okkk pleasee!”.… Guess his response!? ๐Ÿ˜‚ ย he says “yea sure no problem ย love“๐Ÿ˜Ž

Forward to three days later! ย Hunger has a different ย meaning in this camp๐Ÿ˜ฒ๐Ÿ˜ฒ… As atms are not available…. Boyfriend ย has not flashed… Not even by mistake! ๐Ÿ˜’๐Ÿ˜”. As the good girlfriend that i am! ๐Ÿ˜‡๐Ÿ˜‡๐Ÿ˜‡๐Ÿ˜‡๐Ÿ˜‡๐Ÿ˜‡ i borrow credit from the network provider and call bae…. Imagine he acts all cheerful ย and happy… Like he missed me forever! ๐Ÿ˜’๐Ÿ˜’๐Ÿ˜’๐Ÿ˜’๐Ÿ˜’๐Ÿ˜’๐Ÿ˜’( oldman park well) …….trust me naaaa! ย I go direct and ask “is it because i ask you for credit card that you refused to talk to me for three days

Can you ย try to guess his reponse? ย Hahahahahahah at all your wrong… This is what he said ” oh my love ย i have been sooo busy, ย been trying to gather funds to send the recharge card ” hmmmmmmmm! ๐Ÿ˜จ๐Ÿ˜จ๐Ÿ˜จ๐Ÿ˜จ๐Ÿ˜•๐Ÿ˜•๐Ÿ˜• ah swear.. I confuse dieeee… Like bro seriously!? ย How much credit are you sending…. And this guy just bought a BBpassport the week ohhhhh!…

At that junction i ended the call, i can’t shout!๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜… And the rest is history…

See babes i come from a family where ย i have learnt that it is an EROOORRRRRRRR to marry ย someone who finds it hard to give….. I repeat ERROR

Be it you or your significant other, ย be sensitive to the needs of your partner… Dont even wait for them to ask… If its in your capacity… Do it and if you can’t…. Oga no dey form… Say you no go fit! ๐Ÿ˜’

Oya i have gisted you my own… Its your turn… Comment below on what lesson(s) your ex taught you.

Thank you so much ย for taking out time to read and please do like and comment.

God bless you and cause you to prosper above your wildest dreammmmssss…

LOVE LANGUAGES(LL๐Ÿ˜˜๐Ÿ˜˜)??????๐Ÿ˜จ๐Ÿ˜ฑ


I struggled with ย every relationship i ever was in…. Of course i didn’t ย know this was what it was… It was more like ” i don’t think he loves me enough”๐Ÿ˜”๐Ÿ˜ฅ or something why doesn’t he wants to call or hang out!… This affected a lot of my relationships because i would literally want the guy to love me ย exactly the way i loved him! ๐Ÿ˜ž๐Ÿ˜ž๐Ÿ˜ž๐Ÿ˜ž bigggggg disappointment… It never ย everrrrr worked, ๐Ÿ˜ซ๐Ÿ˜ฉ and then at some point, i would just give up.

Now i am 70% certain that a lot of ย us have felt this way at least one time! ย Or like me most times! ๐Ÿ˜€๐Ÿ˜€.. But then i read a book ” The five love languages” by Gary Chapman(funny he bears the same name with my favorite drink!! Hehe) ย ๐Ÿ˜‰๐Ÿ˜‰.

Okay so in this book my understanding ย was opened to the fact that love speaks languages! ๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜ hehe am guessing you didn’t know too… Buh yah! ย It does, ย and ย it is divided into 5ย categories which are:

ย ย RECEIVING GIFTS! ๐ŸŽ๐ŸŽ:ย I quote from the book.. “For some people, what makes them feel loved is to receive a gift.. The gift communicates the message “he thought of me” or she really does love me”. Now the task is to observe your partner, what does he or she like, or what do they lack that they really need… Nigerians aren’t ย fond of buying gifts.in short guys are dodging February14th๐Ÿ‘Ž๐Ÿ‘Ž๐Ÿ‘Ž. Especially the girls๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜. Seee choose to be different, ย ladies spoil your man!

 

Couple Playing Backgammon on Floor --- Image by ยฉ Ralf Schultheiss/zefa/Corbis

Couple Playing Backgammon on Floor — Image by ยฉ Ralf Schultheiss/zefa/Corbis

QUALITY TIME๐Ÿ‘Œ โŒšโŒš: Quality time for me is the best… And as the name implies, it is basically ย giving or spending quality ย time with your significant other, giving your undivided attention and doing the things you both love or simply just gisting๐Ÿ’‘๐Ÿ’‘๐Ÿ’‘I am definitely under this love language group, ย because as much as i loveeee gifts…๐Ÿ˜‰๐Ÿ˜‰ its nothing to me, if you don’t have my time. (If you like don’t buy gift you hear! ๐Ÿ˜ค๐Ÿ˜“)

 

his-and-hers-2WORDS OF AFFIRMATION : Yes guys and it’s basically ย “Expressing affection through spoken affection, praise, or appreciation”. Your words may focus on the other person’s personality or the way they look or something they have done for you. ย If your persons primary ย love language is words of affirmation, ย your words would mean everything, nothing will speak more deeply of your love than words of affirmation .

ย I am semi in this categories… Who doesn’t like sweet lovey dovey words huh? ๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜

 

wp-1474826149845.jpg

PHYSICAL TOUCH! ๐Ÿ‘ซ๐Ÿ’: Now see every culture has what is termed the appropriate and inappropriate touch.. The appropriate touch is loving while the latter is demeaning and destructive. ย If your personal ย person’s primary love language is physical touch, nothing would speak more deeply than appropriate touch. ย And we do know touches have meaning(consciously and unconsciously) ย Assignment number 1: find out the different touches and what they generally mean?

couple-cook-1024x929 ๐Ÿ˜‰๐Ÿ˜‰

ACTS OF SERVICES:๐Ÿ’…๐Ÿ’†: if you speak words of affirmation to people with this love language this is a sample of the conversation. When you’ll say baby i love you.. Their response would be something like this ย “if you love me, ย why don’t you do something to help ย around the house? “. See the key to loving this kind of person will be to find out what things they would like for you to do.. and do them consistently.ย 

Here are some tips on finding out your love language :

1) observe your ย own behavior. ย  ย  ย  ย  ย  ย  ย  ย  ย  ย  ย  ย  ย  2) observe what you complain about. ย  ย  ย  ย  ย  ย  ย 3) observe what you request ย for the most.ย 

I know some of you would say… Yo! ย Joy i belong to all the categories…๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜•, Yeap thats very possible but the thing is.. There is always a PRIMARY AND A SECONDARY LOVE LANGUAGE (PRIMARY=YEAP THATS DEFINITELY ME, ย SECONDARY=YEA YEA ย A LIL BIT)ย 

So guys find out your and your partner’s love language and learn to love them the way the want to be loved and not the way you want to be loved… Research shows that its very rare for couples to have the same primary love languages..ย 

I do hope this summary has helped you guys… For a deeper understanding.. Please get the book and read it.ย 

Thank you awesome readers.. I ๐Ÿ’ U.ย 

I wish you a HAPPY NEW MONTH and in this month nothing will steal your Joy. ๐Ÿ˜˜๐Ÿ˜˜๐Ÿ˜˜

CAREERS VS JOB! ๐Ÿ˜•๐Ÿ˜•is there a difference?ย 

My people i hail you ohh,, sup? ย How your day dey waka naa? Happy Sunday to you dearies! ๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜˜๐Ÿ˜˜๐Ÿ˜˜

So i just dey waka for internet๐Ÿšถ๐Ÿšถ, na im i see say career no be job! ๐Ÿ˜จ๐Ÿ˜ฑ,i bin feel say na the same thing oh! ย But as i con enter deep for the search engine… I shock! ๐Ÿ˜ž๐Ÿ˜ž career and job dey different ohh..you sef no know(olodos๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜œ)..Upon say i be bsc holder.. Nawa!! ๐Ÿ˜ซ๐Ÿ˜ซBut make i for ย explain give una, i gaz enter gear proper english๐Ÿ˜‰๐Ÿ˜‰.

Yes guys, there is a thin line between a job and a career, a very thin one but trust me it makes all the difference! ย So lets dive ย right into it guys! Starting with a basic definition:

A career is the pursuit of a lifelong ambition or the general course of progression towards lifelong goals
WHILE

Job is an activity through which an individual can earn money. It is a regular activity in exchange of payment.ย 

Now from the above definitions, you can clearly see that the thin line between careers and jobs, is the powerful word “PASSION” oh yea! ย You heard me right, Passion!!ย 

Passion ย is sooo powerful๐Ÿ’ช๐Ÿ’ช , it gets you up in the morning, its that untouchable drive that pushes you to go the extra mile even without being told, it is the force that keeps you going even when there is no ๐Ÿž on the table.

I am not saying a job is bad ย ohhh, it can aid your career start up… But right now guys, i am jobbing ๐Ÿ˜ฅ and the truth is,, its a struggle, each morning i wana cry! ย I just feel weak, ย i dont look forward to it at alllllll! ๐Ÿ˜ญ๐Ÿ˜ญ๐Ÿ˜ญ,and when im at work, ย its all about counting down to closing hours ๐Ÿ•”, that’s so wrong, ย even though the pay is aii! ๐Ÿ‘Œ, i see me resigning soonest (thats a secret guys! ๐Ÿ˜ฎ). I really don’t want you guys to go through the same tguys so ,ย So here’s my lil advice guys,

  1. ย Do what you love and love what you do.ย 
  2. Do not be pressured by your parents to do what they want, ย humbly and politely convince them otherwise ย and diligently ย pursue it,ย 
  3. Its not gonna be easy guys, but we know nothing awesome ย comes easy!ย 
  4. So hussle hard, pray harder, and flex hardest. ๐Ÿ˜€๐Ÿ˜€๐Ÿ˜€๐Ÿ’†๐Ÿ’‡๐Ÿ’…๐ŸŸ๐Ÿป๐Ÿป

Love you guys… Joy from within cannot be stolen! ๐Ÿ’๐Ÿ’๐Ÿ’๐Ÿ’๐Ÿ’๐Ÿ’๐Ÿ’๐Ÿ’๐Ÿ’๐Ÿ’๐Ÿ’

Thanks you ย for your support and love, means a lot , please do leave a comment and a like !๐Ÿ˜˜๐Ÿ˜˜๐Ÿ˜˜